It's 17.44 now, and i just cried. Got swolen eyes after watching Aftershock, this movie is extremely touching, its about your family and earthquake in 1976 at Thang San, you should watch. and i dont know what happen to me, to my heart, it feels like shit, too hurt. Broken. Full of scratch. Disappointment. Loneliness. Pain. Lies. Sadness. Afraidness. Indifference. Isolated. Hate. I want my full-heart back.
Okay, everybody keep asking me where will i go, which university will i go, what major will i take. aaaaaaargh i dont want to discuss about it now or later. I dont know why i hate, extremely hate when people asked about that question. Dont keep asking me, im afraid, i know my life will change after May 2011, i cant imagine what my life will be, what will happen to me later, i know im absolutely craving for a new life, new activity but not this fast and you know what? I just want to enjoy my last year in high school, i dont wanna think too much. im afraid. I just want to stay in high school forever. Times past too quick. Please make it slower.
And he keep promising me something, i dont need your promise if you cant make it true. I know something will happen after we graduate, you stay here or there, i still dont know where ill stay, then we are apart, can we be together again like now? im not brave enough to face 2011. I still want my high school life with you and my friends. I beg you to keep your promises, and something good will happen to us, trust me. And one thing you should now : No one else could ever mean half as much to me as you do now. You get what i mean now yes? yeah, the point is im afraid of losing you, i need you.
Love,
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